Pick One.

I know there are a lot of supposedly hip parents who think they can be one of the gang with their child and his or her friends. Well you can do that to a certain extent. But there will come a time when you are going to need your child’s respect and obedience not his friendship. And if you have abdicated one in favor of the other, expect the two of you to be taken aback by the reaction. It’s one of those situations where no one should be surprised. Unfortunately that doesn’t happen often. If you find yourself thinking of the parent/child relationship as a clerical formality, like some puffball job title in a bureaucracy, and you tend to view the kid as your best friend, you need to find some new friends. It’s inappropriate. It’s no different from the boss who goes out drinking with her subordinates and then wonders why they’re taking 90min. lunches and writing down an hour. I’m telling you this because it’s what I have observed in my lifetime. I don’t have children. While I don’t have experience dealing with the rigors of that life I have seen parents dealing with the aftermath of those “friendships.” However I have been in front-line management as a lead and I have had subordinates that I tried to stay on friendshippy terms with and that caused problems as time wore on.