The IRS decides to audit Ralph, and summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor is not surprised when Ralph shows up with his attorney. The auditor says, “Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. [...]

By the time a man needs Enzyte, Viagra, Levitra, Cialis, Viapren Strips, and so forth, he is usually taking Maximum Strength Excedrin, Doan’s Pills, and Glucosamine/Chondroitin and thus can’t go far once he gets it up.